Before I Got Sick

Before I got sick

I’d never have to wonder 

Do they mean MS as in Microsoft 

Or MS as in Multiple Sclerosis

As I read on my computer screen

MS is evil

Before I got sick

I couldn't imagine

Having so many x-rays done

That I'd find myself joking

I'll surely be glowing soon

Before I got sick

I’d never have to explain that

When I say I feel tingly

It doesn’t mean that I have a warm and tingly 

Happy feeling deep inside my gut

Before I got sick

I had no idea that before I hit 30 

I’d already be walking like 

My sweet sweet grandma used to 

Just years before she died

Before I got sick 

I’d never imagine

Sticking a needle into my flesh

Every day of the week

No, not a needle full of junk

To make me get high

But instead a needle full of meds that cost more than our rent

To try to prevent more damage to my poor scarred brain

Before I got sick

I’d never heard the word Sarcoidosis

Nor did I know I’d see so many doctors in my lifetime

Let alone in 3 years

Since I got sick 

I'm still the same me 

That you always knew

A little slower

Bigger

Weaker

Stronger

But still

Just me with a new title or two

The girl with MS

The girl with Sarcoid

She’s still just me.

September 22, 2004